The Tale of Good Guy Guy Goodly, Part the First:

Back these many moons ago, I was a student at East Upper Cupcake State University, majoring in parties and alcohol, with a minor in recreational pharmaceuticals,

After the foofaraw when the Misery Gore Amazing Amoebas Marching Band and Chorus played Sue Thompson's hit "Norman" at a football game, the Misery Gore Bored of Education suspended the entire band and chorus.

A year or two after graduation, a few of the Misery Gore musicians – those who weren’t in prison – showed up at EUC State.

We all got good and hammered one night and decided that we would have a 50s and 60s radio show on Radio Free East Upper Cupcake. It was called “Good Guy Guy Goodly,” and the host was voiced by one of the very few people on earth with a perfect radio voice. We had a whole crew backing him up: Ace Newsman Russ Willard (voiced by a guy who went to work for NPR), Honest Charlie of Honest Charlie’s Clean Used Cars, located in Cedar Grove, and a host of others.

We realized we needed some jingles for the Good Guy, so I lined up half a dozen members of the Oratorio Society, an audition-only-by-invitation-only (and hence, fairly snooty) choral group I had managed to join.

Our first jingle used Ernie Fields’ recording of Glenn Miller’s classic “In The Mood,” with our own lyrics:

Good Guy Guy Goodly, he’s the King of the Hop

Good Guy Guy Goodly lets you bop till you drop

Good Guy Guy Goodly you’ll be feelin so right

Good Guy Guy Goodly rockin’ all through the night

There’s no chancin’ romancin’ if he’s not in sight

Good Guy Guy Goodly every Saturday night